Positive Self-Talk


I can, I will, I am going to! This is the mantra you will hear at a Success Starts Now conference. 

What is “self talk”?  I was introduced to self-talk when I was in high school by one of my football coaches. He pulled me off to the side and asked me, “Dustin, are you going one hundred percent in every play?”  I told him, “yeah, well sometimes I am and sometimes I’m not”.  He asked why and I told him “I feel like I need to save energy so I can make it through the whole game and still do well.” Then He told to say out loud, before EVERY play, “I go 100 percent.”  I said “Ok”, told him I would follow through and that before every play I would literally start saying, out loud, “I go 100 percent.”  And I did.

It started with the words and then it began to change my self-image. My actions then started following the way I thought and the way I felt and I actually started playing at 100 percent. Prior to this, I was never considered the best player on the team and I certainly wasn’t considered the best player on the field… but through that positive self-talk, I ended up changing my actions and made the All-State team.  I ended up playing 2 years of college football and it really all started with self-talk.

What is self-talk and why is it so important? I remember going to the Southwestern Company and my first year in sales school and Dan Moore gets up on stage and tells a story about a guy named Mr. Mediocrity and goes on to tell us that Mr. Mediocrity lives in every single person and that it’s our job to condition Mr. Mediocrity.

He told us that Mr. Mediocrity will bounce up and hop on your shoulder and that he will whisper negative thoughts into your head, such as, “what about the economy, this costs too much, this is boring, this job is not the right job for me and I need to be doing something else”.

Your mind has to be conditioned.  The same way that you condition your body through working out, the same way you condition your heart through eating healthy, and the same way you condition your soul, through reading the bible… YOU CONDITION YOUR MIND THROUGH USING SELF-TALK.

Avoid negative thoughts, negative actions, and negative circumstances at all costs.  If you can’t say something positive out loud then don’t say anything at all.  If you’re constantly aware of your speech and your thoughts, and you are actively trying to be positive, you eventually stop negative thinking. 

Self-talk is not only about what you say to yourself, but also what you hear other people saying about you and what you say about other people.  Every word that comes out of your mouth should be lifting people up as well as lifting YOU up.   

Try to take control of every single thing that you say. Here are some actions items and questions that you can think about;

  1. Make a list of all the things that you know you are susceptible to when it comes to negative self-talk, the things your mind tells you that could be negative. Like, “I am not a good reader”, “I can’t wake up early”, or “that may be for other people but that is not for me”.
  2. Then make a list if things that hold you back from making conscious efforts to improve your self-talk. Why do you not use self-talk? Do you think it is cheesy? Do you think that it doesn’t work? Whatever it is make a list of things that would be reason why you don’t do it.
  3. Make a list of people who talk about you in a way that makes you feel better about yourself. Literally, make a list of people who affirm you, lift you up.
  4. Then make a list of the following affirmations:   
  • When you wake up:  “Today is a great day” let that be the first thought that goes through your head.
  • While you are taking a shower: Say something positive about your goal for the day. “I can, I will, I am going to make my 10 phone calls today”.  “I can, I will, I am going to make my 3 sales today”. Say it over and over again while you are taking a shower.
  • While you are driving to work:  “I am so thankful for all the things I have in my life and their area ton of things that I have in my life that I am thankful for”. While driving to work, if you would like to say a prayer, that would be a good time to be alone and pray as you are driving.
  • Before every phone call or every presentation:  Affirmations about having a service line. This presentation is not about me but about the person I am meeting with and how I can help and serve them.  
  • After you do a good thing  OR bad thing: After you make a sale or hear a no, or even after someone cancels, have an affirmation ready.

Using Positive Self-Talk is the difference between an average producer and a top producer.  If you believe this is true… create a list of Positive Affirmations and use them everyday!

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5 Responses to “Positive Self-Talk”

  1. I’m going to do this!

  2. I love this portion of what you said and believe it’s one of the pillar of positive self-talk: “Self-talk is not only about what you say to yourself, but also what you hear other people saying about you and what you say about other people. Every word that comes out of your mouth should be lifting people up as well as lifting YOU up.”
    My first year in the bookfield, I used to think I could just say anything, but then I realized the true impact of positive self-talk was when I was actually saying out loud affirmation of mine that was true about who I am, about what people said about me and that was energyzing, and positive affirmation that aiming to also inspire others.
    I love that. Thanks Dustin.

  3. Mary Brick Says:

    Thank you for these tremendous words of wisdom. I have added this to my daily self talk. Since I started my self talk over 30 days ago it is amazing the changes I have already seen. Really enjoyed hearing you at the seminar in Seattle this week.

  4. I totally agree with all of this. This is what really bumped up my sales this last summer.

  5. Sheri Hillberry Says:

    Thank you Dustin for this Positive Self-Talk posting. I appreciate the action steps you included. I can, I will, I am going to do them next week. The positive self talk breakout session in Seattle WA, August 2010 changed my life! I didn’t realize I was feeding myself negative thoughts. I stopped the negative thoughs that day and the dread and dispair I felt were gone! Positive affirmations are a part of daily routine.

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